I had an encounter with some clarity today as I pondered my artistic (and life) path, and in particular, how I express myself through it. Of all of the pieces of the puzzle to consider, goals to attain, objectives to meet, what is it that I am seeking in my personal musical expression? Of course, I want to be open, in the space, and without agenda. These realizations have settled deeply within me over the last couple of decades. But a window opened up a little in my heart today, enough to let a breeze blow in and rearrange the furniture a bit. And it brought me to recall a conversation with Bruce Kaminsky; a bassist who, in a earlier season of life, I shared many a musical engagement, conjoined with many meaningful conversations. Back then my windows to the deeper expression didn't open as frequently, or easily (especially when I was trying). But when they did, it was obvious to those around me, or at least the musicians I was playing with. Bruce made the observation that when I would begin assertively quoting as I improvised, that would signal the expression deepening. This conversation was many years ago, and I'm sure he said it better than I can restate it. But when he said it, I knew he was on to something. It's been many years since I have seen Bruce, and I'm sure he would have no thought of how this observation has stuck. Today, as I was considering the different objectives jazz musicians (in particular) have when they perform, it came to me. What do I want? I want to be surprised by what I play. That's it. For me, this may be more about rhythmic and/or melodic adventurism than harmonic explorations. But whatever it is, when I am in the moment, I'm just as surprised as anyone who is listening to me with what comes out. And this isn't by accident. Only just now have I realized that what Bruce said was one of the seeds from which grew the learning to let go in order to receive. A lot has happened over those many years. I think it's time to reach out to Bruce and say thank you. If we ever play do a gig together again, it's easy to imagine that he'd be smiling.