Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Is it just me, or are other people experiencing level upon level of disruption and challenge, much as we see on the macro level all around the world? I suspect that, by a long shot, I am not alone. Not everything that disrupts and challenges, though, is bad. In fact, it's not bad at all, unless we get stuck in seeing it that way. I suspect that being thankful in all things (a Biblical admonition to which I aspire) is more than (or not at all about) realizing that others have it worse, whatever it is. It seems (to whatever understanding I possess) that genuine thankfulness is a sincere trust that it (whatever it is) is indeed good, regardless of how I my see it from the confinement of my narrow personal view (at that particular moment). The last month, for me, has been intense. Family concerns that most everyone goes through, but it seems (and doesn't it always, I suppose) that my particular extenuating circumstances are uniquely exasperating. And what have I learned? That I am a mess, easily getting trapped and tangled up in my own head. Yep - the story of my ... performance career. It is true that one's personality is (necessarily) reflected in one's artistic expression (and if any doubt, read the recent concert review on my "news" blog), and so straight lines for me, at any level, are elusive (again, read the review). Just the acknowledgement, though, of being led by my own negative thoughts is it's own confession, of sorts, allowing/reminding me to view beyond them. It all simplifies (even for me) into trust. If I have one straight line, this is it's destination


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